18 April 2007

Fear

The big pitfall with spiritual work is viewing the spiritual and the mundane as conflicting opposites. How do we open our hearts and embrace both in such a way that the fullness and sheer quality of the life lived overshadows either alone. Ultimately it is all a simple matter of love and embrace. Because ultimately it is not what we become that matters but what we give – to what extent do we assist others to become. A monastic life of devotional meditation and prayer will be more attractive to someone who has acute sensitivities and past traumas that make a normal mundane life, with its coarseness and vitality, unbearable. Such a monastic life is as much a retreat from the responsibility of facing up to life as it is a spiritual calling. We cannot face God if we can't face ourselves because they are fundamentally one and the same. The problem of avoidance is everywhere and it very quickly becomes ingrained. Then big upheavals are necessary to wrench the ego apart and start living courageously again. And courage means with fear – facing fear and not running away from it by creating a comfortable life where it never rears its ugly head. As my teacher once said to me – Fear is the best friend you'll ever have.

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